Which kind of marriage is the best marriage?
a) Arranged Marriage
b) Love Marriage
c) Living Together
Marriage is an institution, which binds men and women in family life. It is a stable relationship in which a man and women are socially permitted to live together under one roof and have a family. There is a saying, which goes as "Marriages is a binding of two individuals where each desposes complete faith on the other and swears to live life happily". HT Mazumdar defines marriage as a socially sanctioned union and mating of male and female for the purpose of
a) Establishing a household
c) Providing care for the offspring with the socio- economic changes coming about in our society, the complete concept of marriage has come under scrutiny.
The selection of the partners in India is generally made by the parents or by the elders. It is only after there consent that the marriage is settled. They being more experienced and since have gone through the ups and downs of life, parents are better match selectors and evaluate the merits of would be partners. The young boys or the girls are raw hands with new aspirations, desires, thinking, where the degree of viewpoint towards life is less practical. According to the Hindu Law, Marriage is very pure and religious and not mere a contract. Therefore it is necessary for religious duties. It is also a time for family get together and also a great pomp and show with various rituals involved in it. The super hit movie" Hum Apke Hain Kaun" clearly defines this. That is why the divorce cases are less comparative to the West. In arrange marriages traditions are passed down from one generation to another. In such marriage the other family members are always around and willing to chip in to resolve any difference which crop up.
Love marriage is defined as that type of marriage in which the boy or the girl makes the selection of the spouse and where parents do not play many roles in such decision. As far as India is concerned such type of marriage is not readily accepted especially in rural areas, but it has gained grounds in the urban areas. It is contended that parents in making the selection of mates for their son or daughter are often moved by their own wishes and personal desires and neglect the wishes of the mates to be married. They force upon the girl to many one whom she does not like at all or upon the boy whom he may have despised. Every individual whether male or female has very high aspiration and ideologies regarding his/her partner. Their choice is often those who are physically attractive. And often such decisions for future made on these grounds prove to be fatal. They forget natural shortcomings of human relationship and blame parents for naive demands rather than accepting relationship as a permanent framework. Love marriages are love at first sight and divorce at the next. Moreover we only see positive angle of personality but fail to negate nitty gritty problems of the day to day life.
Some people argue that before a couple permanently enters into a marriage. Both the boys and girls should be allowed to come together and freely mix and meet and also to understand each other's nature and temperament. After understanding each other very openly they then only settle down in life. But this concept is quite new in Indian Culture. It will though help in population control but will lead to anxiety, depression and psychological disorders. It is just because of economic compulsions and priority given to better career first, this concept has been adopted. It is still to find the approval from the social culture strata.
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